i owe it to you all

i have grown 'midst sundry anecdotes and natures glory. i have been through hilly terrains and plateaus, and i have gained considerable momentum. and have launched myself on every cloud... and the time is now that i mention the visionaries whose thoughts have deeply impregnated my virgin mind.

(in alphabetical order)

aamir khan:

i have never been a great connoisseur of his acting prowess. he has but inspired me with his dance. as a kid, i used to stand in front of the mirror and try to ape his steps. i didn't like the fact that he left reena and tied the knot with kiran. but am also a firmly believe that when a relation gets painful you need to decide whether you want to compromise all your life or move on. also looking at kiran rao, i feel that she isn't the conventional devilish "woh". she is polished, dignified and certainly not the house breaker that the media projects her to be. and another thing about aamir that i adore is his "id-speak-my-mind" attitude.

(but besides all of these what i adored most in him, was his tight tight pants. with his crotch clearly outlined. i've grown fantasising about that. especially in the dum duma dum song, in deewana mujh sa nahi. wao. i had such a huge crush on him)

Ajit Singh:

i remember him as the vice principal of my beloved alma matter "guru nanak khalsa college". truly, i never liked him when i was in college. more so because i had to go to him for permissions for room allocation during the prelims of literary events of nazrana (the cultural festival of khalsa college) and he used to grant the permission with a little hesitation. when he became the principal of my college, i thought that the college has come close to his dooms day. no sooner started working, the whole look of the college changed. and to every ones surprise, it was for the good. i felt guilty that i had doubts in my mind about his capabilities. ever since he became the principal, he has introduced a lot of new courses, has helped position the institute as a quality institute and if we have got a b+ award from naac it is just because of him. i remember the day when i cried profusely because of him. seeing our never ending date with khalsa college and enthusiasm, he one day asked gaurav, nitin and me to come to his cabin. he then narrated an anecdote, he said in chaste hindi " a tree starts as a seedling, then it becomes a shrub, a plant and then it metamorphoses to a tree, and then it fruits, the fruit falls down in the soil, there is then, another seedling" . he paused and then he said " there couldn't have been an independent seedling and through it many other seedlings if it didn't leave the mother plant". he then smiled and moved off.

i then realised the importance of his words. he wanted us to look at a life beyond the walls of khalsa. and he wanted us to breed leaders and not merely continue leading.

from that day till now, i have committed myself to finding ways and means to produce leaders rather than followers. i used to guard the little tricks and job secrets that i know. but now i experience immense joy in sharing them with my counterparts and subordinates. thanks to his thoughtfulness and this small anecdote i have been able to scale heights with a positive attitude.

Amar Chitra Katha :

if a story has to be told to a child. it needs to be told the amar chitra katha way. the stories are awe-inspiring and delve into the characters and outlining each one of them perfectly. not just as a child. uncle pai's comic is an inspiration for me even today. moral science which is neither modern nor ancient is what amar chitra katha all about.

ammai :

my grand mom, she loved feeding people, nothing gave her as much joy as that. our house was always stocked with food. be it a neighbour or a far off relative or just a passerby, she would feed all with the same unbiased compassion. a trait that is not seen in many these days. my grand mom or ammai as she was fondly known was a warehouse of stories that instilled hope, faith and positive affirmations. every child needs to be blessed with the pleasure of listening to grandma stories. they help shape a mind and also build in an ambiance that's conducive for intellectual and empathetic growth. she was extrmly proficient in 6 languages: marathi, gujrathi, hindi, tamil, malayalam and english. in her what i disliked was her non-flexible views, her hatred for animals and her ability to blow things out of proportion at times. but all said and done, i cant deny that i am deeply influenced by her innate nature to feed people. she had told me "anna daanam parama daanam" which means the donation of food is the most supreme of all donations this is a thought that is ingrained in my mind. and will stay with me forever and ever.

amrita rao :

the only movie that i have seen her in toto is main hoon na, so dint know much of her as an actress, but she is a super human being. when i was working with hubb i wanted her to do a photo shoot and also be an ambassadress for a noble cause. i had first sent her an sms and quick my phone rang. the guy on the other end identified himself as gautam, her secretary, he informed me that she was out of town and just after some time i received an sms from amrita herself. though she was riding a new wave of success. she was well grounded. it is indeed noteworthy in this day and age where post success friends become acquaintances and relatives become pests, she did a simple phone call that won her a lot of respect in my eyes.

animal's pals :

ankush, rita vazirani, satnam ahuja, ds and as. i will always remember you for your commitment to the cause of animal welfare. though i might differ in many views and might agree to disagree on many issues. id always respect you'll.

asht:

with whom i had an opportunity to learn the nuances of design and perfection of copy.

bharti teacher :

she taught me maths. i loved mathematics in school and wanted to do my phd in maths. she was instrumental in driving the interest.

dr. venkatesh :

"in a room that is dark, a light someone lights up a matchstick, the darkness goes away, and light takes its place, but where does the darkness go. no where, it comes back when the source (match) is turned off. darkness is universal. light has a source. look for the source enlighten yourself" dr. venkatesh's words have helped me understand so many facts of life.

ekta kapoor:

she is the czarina of the telly screen. i loved her "hum paanch" which starred my far off (ex) relative vidya balan. i simply love "kyunki saas bhi kabhi bahu thi" and could answer any trivia about the serial within a chutki. i love the way she and her creative team thinks their pr stratergy, her story twists and turns, the plots and the griping factors. i am in love with you ekta.

gaurav chopra :

just for laughs, this guy really has a funny bone. but not every one can see the golden heart within. he makes a genuine effort to help people. he and i get along like a house on fire. i practically know all his secrets. and he doesnt even know that im gay.

gunjan chaurasia :

she is my first love. truly. though i never harboured a feeling of sex or lust for her. (naturally i wouldnt). she holds a very special place in my heart and always will.

jaya aunty :

jaya aunty holds a very special place in my heart. we had a lot of contrasting views but still we got along very well. she was our neighbour when we were in sector 6. when i first met her, she came across as someone who was very articulate and skilled. a wonderful speaker and someone who has a beautiful heart.

jimmy :

jimmy has been a sweetheart always. he was just 4 weeks old when my uncle got him home. i was so bloddy scared of him. the moment he saw me he ran behind me and i ran for my life. i was wearing a lungi. and the lungi was down and i was up the mango tree. hahaha!

and then when i got down and was forced to let him sniff me. he licked me all over. i bent down and moved my hand over him and closed my eyes. soon, i could feel his saliva all over my palm. i was shivering. but i stayed put in that position. i then i could sence n infant of a few months biting my of fingers. i opened my eyes. looked down and it was jimmy. and eversince, i have been his mother and he has been my mother.

lakhbir kaur :

"no guts, no glory!" this lady stands as an epitome for that. she has been my anchor at one of the most difficult phases of my life. i remember my first nazrana meeting, we were discussing about an event called spin-a-yarn where in 2 participants have to cook up a funny story on a topic given to them. the first one speaks for half a minute and then the other. they alternate so for 3 minutes. teh judgement crieterion was based on contunity, humour, content and presentation. now the premise given to me and jernail (who was my classmate) was " Brass (pause)... the oldest metal known to man". this topic was given to me by suresh from the times group who is an alumni of khalsa. tensed and scared, i didnt hear the topic attentively, before we were given this we were discussing about the vulgar topics taht were a trend when suresh was a student under lakhbir. my mind was stuck at that moment. and my ears heard what my mind told me. i heard "bra's the oldest matter known to man"... it was my turn to speak... i said "i was walking in the streets and i saw an old man, i dont know whether he was a man or a woman but i looked at his bulge and was sure that he was a he. [the audience looked shell shocked and lakhbir's eyes were so big that they could pop out any time] [then "ping" the buzzer rang, and it was jernail's turn]. the poor chap tried continuing teh topic by saying "and you know men are really smart" and just kept harping on the same topic for 1/2 a minute. [again ping] i continued " you know this smart ass, i wasnt interested in his lower part [audience: pin drop silence as if this was a suspense scene] so my eyes moved up and up and up and i realised that this man was wearing a BRA. now this was too much for lakhbir to digest as by now, even the then vice principal " Ajit Singh was on in the same room. she said "BRAAAAHHHHHHH, [she got up from her chair] NOOOOOOO [with extremely animated expressions] IIIIII DDIIIIDDNT SAY THAT" "suresh you said brass didnt u". i was dumb founded. my eyes were moist. after the initial shock that she expressed, there was a vacuum. no noise, no air, nothing in the room. i put my head down and took a deep breath. much that my breath was echoed all over. and slowly as i looked up into the eyes of the audience and suddenly the whole room was enveloped with the sound of cheer. i had all of them, cheering and clapping. as tears trickled down my cheeks and clensed me off my inhibitions for ever. i found wings... i travelled light ever since.

madhuri dixit :

this actress needs no introduction. i loved her dance movements. though i always maintained that madhuri was more popular because of her latka's and jhatka's, where as sridevi is a "true" dancer. i cant deny taht no one could shake her bosom the way madhuri could. teh perfect attitude, business acumen, this microbiologist knew the pulse fo the audience. i dont find her to be a powerful actress but respect her immensely for her understanding of the mindset of indians and her uninhibited expressions. if the is a difference between vulgarity and sensuality, madhuri marks the difference. she has the oomph factor. she can make a gay man straight. (i am an exception though)

maneka gandhi :
i adore her for her love for animals. though i do agree that at times her expressions are too loud, i still have immense respect for her. i still remember my baby steps in the animal welfare domain, she was my only reference point then. i had seen her on doordarshan in a program called "heads and tails" and sent her a letter on the address that was mentioned in the programme. within 10 days of me sending her a letter i received a personalised reply to the querry that i had sent and guess what? she had personally signed it. i called her on the numbers mentioned in her letter, she picked up and to my surprise asked me how my jimmy was doing. so sweet of her to have remembered one of the many letters that she must be receiving every day.

nitin sharma :
our camaraderie dates back to about 10 years now. and we have been with each other midst the highs and lows. im extremely fond of his family. but as far as he goes, i end up fighting with him because of his loud and profound expressions and his pr antiques. though i should confess that i consider him family and that, if ever i call for somebody in help, the first person who comes to my mind is he.

padma :
she is my pretty mother. since childhood i have been very prud of teh fact that i have a very good looking mom. contrary to how men react when someone makes a pass at their mom, i was very happy when someone looked at my mom or told me that she was pretty. yes, she is sexy. and whats wrong in accepting that your mom looks pretty and sexy. besides, she has a very beautiful heart and i am not saying this because she is my mom. but because she is this way actually.

papia guha :
you know all these high society people! thats how one would phonate while speaking about her. but my story is a little different. for others she is pradeep guha's wife. for me, she is one of my peofessors who plays a vital role in shaping my personality. i remember the days when during the college festival preparations, she looked at me from the third floor when i was busy cleaning the foyer area in teh ground floor of our college. i dont know why, but i always felt that she knew that i was gay. though i myself was confused. i also remember teh days when i used to run away from her because i happened to lose her kashmeeri shawls during one of the literary events, and i was really scared of her. :-)

parvathy :
she is my aunt. in all practical terms equivalent to my mom. i dont agree with her many times. i fight and get into a tiff with her. but thats the liberty that we take with loved ones dont we?

parvinder kaur :
she is one of the beautifullest professors that i had, (though off late, too much of laali makes her look like a lakme sample testing center). i used to sit in teh first bench for her lecture. one day when i made a spelling mistake. she funnily asked me "tumhe english kaun padaatha hai. kitaabon mein dhyaan nahi dete kya class mein" (she was our english teacher). i candidly replied " hum aapko dekhte the, aur aap kitaab mein". and she rather than getting pissed off said "chal badmaash"... hahaha!

she stayed close to my house and was someone whom i could go and have a conversation with anytime. she was the first ever faculty friend that i had. she was teh one to whom i had first confessed about the sex abuse incident. though i dont meet her often. times and people change, but memorable moments remain memorable.

payal shah :
i have worked with her in hanmer and partners, and she is someone from whom i have learnt the basics of event management. she understands people and their needs very well. im completely bowled over by her ability to think differently. i've tried thinking like her. but have always fallen short. i can conceptualise well. but not like her.

pooja bhatt :
i remember clearly, this was one of her sadak days, where she was at the peak of popularity. i had called her for a protest against ill treatment of animals that ahimsa, the ngo was planning. i had called a dozen people. most of them filled with attitude to teh brim. she, ayesha jhulka and bipasha basu, all 3 very famous people then were most down to earth. pooja bhatt, asked me to hold on, got her diary, gave me aamir khan's number and also expressed her apology for not being able to make it for the event. the tone in which she spoke to me... very conversational and very unlike celebrity, really touched me. bipasha was also very sweet, and ayesha jhulka asked me if tehre were some pom pups that she can adopt. all 3 were sweet, but simplicity, thy name is pooja. love you poo. i was in first year college,at that age we are all awe struck by celebs.

praful baweja :
vaddi zabaan, vadda dil. he is a sweetheart and i not only love him but also have immense respect for him. i don't necessarily agree with him in all his views, but his fully formed views about things has never bother me. praful, has a view about every thing. i don't. lol. he has a golden heart which often gets camouflaged by the animated facial expressions and hard hitting views on various issues. i had met him on a chat show "minus 30" by paras, i had mentioned in the passing to him in our first meet that i was looking out for a job. and then we had not been in touch. suddenly, after 3 months or so, i got a call from him, he remembered that iw as looking out for an opportunity and gave me payals number who was working with hanmer. how many of us remember acquaintances leave alone helping them after 3 months of no contact. he does. if my career is on a track, its because of him. love you praful. muaaah!

prateek kumar :
4 years back, i had walked into shobiz. and 4 years later i walked in back. last time i was an amateur. now i was a professional. shobiz was the only place where i was rejected. the big hidden ego in me had written off shobiz as an un achievable dream. when i walked in shobiz with a pessimistic attitude, i asked rehmatali ji where was prateek, he pointed at a young boy. i went upto that boy and told "prateek kumar". and he was prateek, some one with no attitude about the altitude that he sat on. simple in his outlook and simpler in his way of conduct. something thats a rarity these days. he says very little, but is a good observer. he is someone who'd not say no, without making an attempt. i have immense respect for him.

pravesh vishwanath :
he is my friend. though a professor from my college. id relate more to him as an exstudent of khalsa than a teacher-student relationship. my literary line of thought is because of him. many of my words mentioned in my blog are either inspired or copied from his lingo library. his keen interest in events and social issues, made us thick friends as we have a lot of interests in common.

priya:
i have grown along with her. though she has never behaved as my younger sister, she with her dominating attitude has often been my older sister for all practical purposes. im very fond of her and love her immensely.

raj kapoor :
who doesnt like the original shoman. his sense of cinema and sensuality is great. he had the balls to show the balls (literally). bobby, ram teri ganga maili and shree 420 are the movies i am very fond of. but the movie that i feel was truly wonderful was "prem rog".

rishi kapoor :
i loved him in rafoo chakkar. i loved him in bol radha bol. i loved him in prem rog.i found the old young bobby wala rishi kapoor very sexy and yummy. he and aamir khan, 2 people i have grown fantasizing. ranbhir kapoor, yes, im fond of him too... (i didnt spot his cock as my other gay pals did in jabse mile naina :-( )

saurabh prabhakar :
saubi, as log call him pyaar se is a very sweet friend of mine. i have interacted with him just twice. the first time, he came across as someone who was very affluent and brash. but there was something in him that told me, that he is like a coconut, soft insde. and that softness was exposed to me, teh very next meeting mein. he probably is the only person in this list whom i have met only twice but still hold him close to my heart. i chat with him often. infact every day online on gtalk. and with my constant interactions find him to be an innately warm hearted person. from my interactions with him, i have learnt that one should not form an opinion about people who are venting out their frustrations.

seema mulrlidhara :

shanta teacher :
sheetal bhan :
shruti :
simran ghai :
special someone :
sridevi :
sushma reddy :
sushmita sen :
t.r. ramakrishna :
tatoppa :
umesh nair :

umesh is a sweet little child. a child who has often amased me with his simplicity. he has a very down to earth approach. something thats a rarity in these days. i dont know why he holds me in high regard. but i definitely know why i hold him in high regard. he has braved the death of his mother with utmost maturity. overnight i have seen the boy become a man. i remember the days, when i was organizing a solo event under the banner of NEST with nitin and others. we often were bereft of funds. and he would travel like a courier boy delivering tickets for the social cause. he felt no shame in doing what he was. he didnt feel that we were taking advantage of him. he infact worked for the cause and never tomtomed about it. im sure that this boy will go a long way. with his heart being in the right place. he will be famous. rich and famous soon. amen.

vikram joshi

:

... still incomplete, will fill in details about each of these people soon,

the list is long,

too long.