Monday, April 30, 2012

Zindigi Live : Parents of Gay/Lesbian

this is yet another wonderful episode by the lovely richa. if there is one programme that one should never miss in hindi television, it is this one. thank you Nitin for putting this up together and Richa for being what you are.

one thing that i would take away from this show is that once your folks accept you the way you are, you simply blossom and bloom.  i should say that most children wish that their parents should respond positively the moment you tell them. well, coming out is a process and it is not an impulsive decision. every case and every house is different. our parents are all different. they react differently to their child's coming out. if you think that your parents would be completely averse to your sexuality, it would be prudent to first be financially independent, just in case of any adversity. please understand like you have struggled and planned your coming out,  you need to give your parents time to come out of 'their' closets and accept you too. there are not too many examples of positive love stories and happy gay families to cite, so it is natural for them to think that you are doing something unnatural. their worries, their upbringing - is something you also need to understand. give them time. be patient.  the miracles  happen  when you believe that one could happen.

last year i was awarded the zindigi live  award, i was amongst the 10 chosen from participants of over 100+ episodes. i should say, i feel so much like  family with  richa, farheen and also nitin.  i am often teased as the kalam-wali-bai's best friend and many have asked me the secret to it. well, there is no secret except the fact that i look as journalists as friends, not as journalists. and yeah, i dont believe in using the messenger to air my message and then bitching about the same media behind their back. i have some amazing friends from the media  fraternity, like deborah, i hardly knew that the chick who interviewed me 4 years back would be one of my best buddies today who considering that i am inundated with distress calls for sharing-counselling... and the fact that i have my hand in a hazaar-odd causes... helps me strategise to assure that each cause is expressed in a stremlined manner  by being  my media-pimp. :-)

Monday, April 23, 2012

sex life of Abhishek Singhvi

the news of congress man Abhishek Manu Singhvi's sex tape is doing it's rounds. 
he apparently had sex with a senior lawyer. 
i mean is the problem that he had sex or is the problem that he had sex with a lawyer. 
would we be happy if he did not have sex at all? 
and, why the hell we debating about Abhishek Manu Singhvi's sex life?
why cant he have a sex life?
and if he is cheating on his wife or boyfriend... let them complain.
and then we can take a doosri-aurat-se-mukti  or a queer-cheater andolan against him. 

so what if he does a senior lawyer or who-so-ever? 
why do we have such a resigned-nosey attitude towards sex?
why is "making-love"/"having sex" the foremost parameter in "judging" morality standards?

and why blame social media  abhishek manu singhvi?
darling abhishek, we are a voyeuristic nation. 
we like to watch padosan kamla water her gamlas, 
and Rajesh whose hostel is right across our window dry his V cut jockey
..more than making love to our partner.
So Chill. 
Don't you blame social media, rather use social media to track down the miscreant who destroyed the fire-wall of your bedroom.
lets catch the freak who caused the leak!! 

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Vicky Donor : Beyond the "Jerk"

I am a bane.
I am lame.
People are shy to take my name.

Men get low. 

After I flow.

After that mighty blow.

I used to be treated as a magic potion.
Today I am a discarded white lotion. 
I am forgotten after going through the commotion.

I take you high in your dreams

I also end your screams

But, boy, Im a stick-on protein, i don't melt like ice-cream.

I dive deep down.

Still I am frowned...

like a stain in a coat, a gown.

I end your morning wood.

For some I serve as kink, as drink and food.

Yet i today brood.

I am nobel prize worthy o! Ignorant man.
I define newtons law of motion

"Rigorous forward and backward motion gives rise to white lotion"

I am a liquid. 
A liquid with emotion.

I cause hair perm.

I am a sperm. I am  sperm. I am sperm.


Never never. Never ever has someone given sperms such a respectable place in indian cinema. John abraham does. Vicky Donor is an #epic. A punjabi munda vicky arora is jobless. He acts as a male-aaya at his mother's beauty parlour. He is being stressed by his hardworking beauty parlour chalane wali bewdi widow mother. She keeps taunting him to find himself a job. Vicky is supported by his grand mom who is quirky and modern and bewdi. Desperate vicky is the perfect genetic prototype. His great grand dad made 18 babies. So doctor annu kappoor thinks he is the perfect sperm donor to save his sinking fertility clinic that sees a lack of "potent" donors. The queue outside doctor's clinic asking for 'aishwarya' or 'dhoni' as a child is never ending. Vicky agrees after much persuasion. He fills the vial with his sperm. And whoa! It is indeed the most potent. Women get richer and richer. And he becomes richer and more 'dad'er day by day.
Vicky falls in love with bengalan Ashema. He doesn't tell her that he is a sperm donor but she tells him that she is a divorcee. And that she lives by her intellectual unmarried buaji and widower father. They get married. She can't conceive as she has blockage in her fallopian tube. So, vicky gets upset that he is the father to so many but he doesn't have a child of his own still. At this moment, she discovers about vicky's profession. She leaves him. And he is screwed. what follows is the conscience stir of the doctor who decides to get all the kids of vicky together to cause hriday-parivartan in ashema. And wow. She does. And a nice happy ending.

Now, if I have revealed the story have I soiled your fun? Naah. You should watch this film for its sheer honesty. And the laughter gas it let's out on you. The epic scene is where vicky's mom tells the bong ashema's dad "mushil hoga naa... Aap 'widow', behen 'bachelor' aur beti 'divorce'" needless to say, my ribs were ripped apart as I held my tummy in uncontrollable laughter. At a time when mamata banerjeeis busy censoring cartoons and suffers from abysmal lack of sense of humour, vicky just needs to throw her name in the ring to win over ashema. How can marry a bong and not speak intellectual politics? I personallly have been a victim of the lack-of-sense-of-humour of bongs. And I'll not be surprised if I get hate mails for stating that "trust a bong (or homosexual or bangaloorian or a tissian) to start an intellectual discussion on anything."
The film's about sperms, while you would obviously walk out with pride and respect for the most mobile sperm of vicky - ayushman, you would beat your chest in pride about the coming of age of women in this film. A class performances by bewdi daadi and bewdi maa. Wish I was a woman and had ovaries like that. So flaunt worthy. Guts is what it takes to make a film about the most forbidden S word. Sperm. The film intricately breaks into a lot of taboo topics brilliantly. It is a film about woman's liberalisation with the role of the mom - dolly and grand mom (who is as open as sambhav's dadi was in we the people). Its a film about sexuality and the need to speak to your children freely about sex. The scene where ashema's father urges his daughter to return to vicky by sharing the way he used to make love with her mom is (for the lack of a perfect word) 'endearing'.

There are portions which I first felt that this film will lead to riots in bengal. But then, the way they balanced it with punjabi bashing and humour was just superb. The acting is flawless. The actors have dissolved their real lives into the reel roles they are playing. You don't see ayushmann in the film - you only see vicky arora. Everyone fits in so well, even the support cast. Even the dog and extras in the film seems to be in character throughout. The music is so so, but befitting. The direction - wow. The one person who deserves the national award and the oscar and the BAFTA for this film is the dialogue writer. There are dialogues and there are "dialogues". I can't even share it in words... It is to be seen in vicky donor.

The film is so inspiring that it could be raining sperms at rutambara clinic, you would drive down and dive into the vial.

The film has one scene where the doctor is screening people and one of them is panzy, campy gay. As a reflex action I tweeted john reminding him quirkyly that he has a great gay fan base and most of us start sperming thinking of him. It was yes offensive. But hey, its okay. They also made fun of several other stereotypes. Being as funny as others, seems like making us as normally abnormal. It's sexy to be a part of a species that invokes laughter than being one boring heterosexual. And well, stereotypes exist, even normal is a sterotype. Hai naa? :)

That scene that speaks of the bias against gay sperms provokes me to say
 "I have tested my sperm myself under a microscope during my masters studies and it runs faster than ben johnson. I have had sex. And will too have sex in future unless baba ramdev abducts me. But I am safe always, and hiv and other venereal disease free. True aryan blood I am. Spiritual not religious. Famous, little bit. Dimpled. Fair. Activist. Revolutionary. Love women and men and other animals. Make love to men.I am a gay sperm. Priced at Rs. 10, 000 per ejaculate. 25% of this money goes to a social cause NGO of your choice. Interested in my sperm?

Monday, April 16, 2012

Happy Birthday To Me at 33

i have not survived 33 years. i have earned them. a dig in the past would reveal that everything that i once thought was far-fetched is now on my lap. i wouldnt say i have had a difficult life. i have not. i have had a challenging life for sure though. yesterday night i spent answering calls. and smss and emails and what-else and what not. it is hard to imagine that some years back i had written

here is a page from my personal diary, written some 16 years back on this very day.

"Will there be someone. Someone. Someone to wish me. Will I ever have a friend with whom I could be myself with. I want to grow up. I want to be old. I want to fight and come out and shout. But will my voice echo back, or will it move through many ears. Someday, perhaps, someday... I will shout. And I will not only be heard, I will hear back from the universe" 

and see where i am today. i have more emails than a three thousand emails and smss and other notifications put together.

and this wonderful video by shiv + a cake he baked for me. :) thanks shiv.


then there is this mail from Mike Dooley of

this is a website that strikes the right cord at the right moments.

Happy Birrrrthday to Youuuu,
Happy Birrrrthday to Youuuu,
Happy Birrrrthday Dear Harish ,
Happy Birrrrthday to Youuuu!

A few years back, not so long ago, heaven and earth erupted into a major celebration with the news of your impending adventure into this very time and space. You see, someone like Harish Iyer doesn't come along all that often. In fact, there's never been a single one like you, nor is there ever ANY possibility that another will come again. You're an Angel among us. Someone, whose eyes see what no others will EVER see, whose ears hear what no others will EVER hear, and whose perspective and feelings will NEVER, ever be duplicated. Without YOU, the Universe, and ALL THAT IS, would be sadly less than it is.

Quite simply:

You're the kind of person, Harish ,
Who's hard to forget,
A one-in-a-million
To the people you've met.
Your friends are as varied
As the places you go,
And they all want to tell you
In case you don't know:
That you make a big difference
In the lives that you touch,
By taking so little
And giving so much!

Harish , you are so AWESOME! For your birthday, friends and angels from every corner of the Universe, including buddies you didn't know you had, will be with you to wish you the HAPPIEST of days and an exciting new year in time and space. You won't be alone!


Mike Dooley
Orlando, Florida, USA

PS - Harish , this is going to be YOUR year!!


and my de... sent me this.

I love you , too! Am proud of you... your courage and commitment, your kindness and compassion.

Happy Birthday, Harish!

May you go from strength to strength!

with much affection, and all my blessings. 
Richa Anirudhha posted this on her facebook fan page :-)
Guys pls join me in wishing @harrish iyer a very happy bday! He has not only been my guest on ZL, but a solid support, a friend, a well-wisher and a wonderful human being....happy bday harish!

and i received some 88 wishes :) 
I spent the day before with Deborah. thank you so much for being my maal-in-chief. and getting talli with me. :) i love the fact that we are so stupid when we are together. 


and then above all is gunjan, who matters to me the most, needless to say, the first one, got candid on facebook and shared this. 

Happy birthday my first love. My darling, it feels blessed to know you, fight with you and love you. I miss you so very very much. I may not say it as often, but you are precious to me and I cherish every moment of this beautiful relationship we share. Harrish darling, I love you and wish you the very best that life has to offer. May all your wonderful dreams come true. I love you

and thank you for the countless wishes, blessings, emails, messages, love and whatelse and what not. :) it feels so wonderful being connected by an invisible thread of love. :)
love yaa

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Naturally, She Will Be Raped!

 Women in dilli have a great capacity. They endure rape. And yet get raped again. And again and again. Yet they go out to work? I mean. Why should they work? They should not! They should sit at home and cook for their husbands , their fathers. In the night, they are supposed to loosen their petticoats and allow their husbands or any other  man in respectable position to rape them. What is a woman if she is not raped? She is meant to serve her husband a glass of coffee in the morning and is not liable to be offered the pleasure of lubrication in the night. Domestically, she is raped. Outside she is raped. And I agree with Delhi police, she invites it on herself. The Delhi police should be awarded and suitably rewarded for spelling it out so wonderfully. Kudos. Can I add another medal and a black tikka on your forehead. Haii.. kisi ki nazar na lage iss wonderful dimaag ko.

One honorable inspector says that women shouldn’t dress sleazily else they will get raped.”
Exactly. It is a major turn on for all men in the capital city. 

“Women shouldn’t drink with men and get inside cars with them”.

Absolutely. With you sir. If they sit in the car, together, their legs would brush against each other and men will feel like raping. I mean, I agree sir, it is not the Man’s fault. It is never the man’s fault. His hormones just get excited. And he does  it. Big deal.

“Her mother is having an affair. Naturally daughter will be HUNGRY FOR SEX.”
Point sir. Point! I mean, MARVELOUS.  I never thought of that angle. The angle of  ganda khoon, that illegitimacy runs in the blood. I really appreciate your influence of old hindi tawaif films. You are so beautifully influenced by it.

And sir, when you say that no rape can happen without the woman’s provocation – I agree with that too. She would have removed her clothes and asked him to come and rape.

And sir, if we still don’t want rape,  what we should be doing? Guess Locking women back in their ghoonghats would be a jolly good  idea!. We should not allow any woman to walk on the streets after 8pm. And after 7pm in winters for the sun sets early then. And sir, one suggestion, we should draw inspiration from the lovely Muthalik government in Karnataka and beat up bad girls who stay up late. And if we cant beat them, they would rape them. Naturally. LOGIC!  I  would be really pleased sir if you could declare rape as the national capital sport. And yaah, Women would be raped. And that  magazine called Tehelka should not make an issue out of it.  Some women love skating, some men love raping.

But sir you say she invited it, I say men invented it.

Now , on a serious note after the sarcastic piece written above in absolute disgust after watching the Tehelka sting on NDTV and reading the story– I feel  it is time for women in delhi and other parts of the country to create an uprising. And for well-mothered and good-cultured boys to join them. There is an urgent to send the Delhi police on a long vacation. Something that could serve as a deterrent for people in other cities too, for to have form a picture in our minds  that our friendly-neighbourhood-inspector bhau in the chowky or Darogaji Thanedar doesn’t have the same kind of views is as foolish as thinking Osama Bin Laden would be setting up charities for world peace. O he is dead. Let this issue not die though. The education and neutralization of beliefs and prejudices is much needed. Besides sacking them from their jobs. The police force should also look within and introduce corrective measures against presumptions and cold-heartedness towards the oppressed survivor of abuse. And this, irrespective of the type of abuse be it child sexual abuse, hate crimes against homosexuals or rape and atrocities against women. I don’t refute when people say that women extort  under the pretext of rape. I am just saying don’t dare presume. I am saying women is as human as a man. And could be in the good way  and also in a bad way. Women needn’t be seen in the extremes of a devi or a devil.  A woman is “judged” and “tested” from time immemorial. The fact however remains – if men had a hymen, virginity would be a myth.  

Good Bye Victoria!

After being the reason for the bread-butter and jam, tonga owners mercilessly whip their dhanno.

I have seen this so many times at the queens necklace -

The passengers would smooch over the arabian sea in a tonga (an orgasmic scene overglorified by bollywood) completely oblivious to the fact that the horse is thin, bleeding and limping.

or in sheer assholiness, insensitive parents would ask the owner to whip for the 'fun'.
I think, animal cruelty is the best way to kill compassion in a child. The parents should get full marks in that.

When dhanno is old, she finds herself in haffkine institute bleeding for anti-venom.

That's your desi victoria.

Congrats Maneka Aunty (still have your handwritten letters written to me when I was in my late teens), Ambika Shukla and Team People for Animals for winning this landmark case against victorias, let's bid good bye to victorias with love.

We are good without the whipping scenes. Ask psychologists the impact of this.

As for the tonga owners... "Just as gratitude, ingratitude pays too"

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

TISS and Bangalore

I had been asked to watch Chiller Party  many times by my friend ex student of Tata Institute Of Social Sciences, Varun Kumar Nair. I kept procrastinating. I probably thought that this must be one of those many intellectual orgasms that TISS students engage in. (I believe that stereotypes exist and we need to celebrate them. For that matter even NORMAL IS A STEREOTYPE) On that note let me state that TISScians are unique. As unique as the maggi and chai at the TISS tapri. They have the ability to put numbers and big words to everything that any other person will term as "simple joys of life". Film-wise, they are a mixture of Bimal Roy and Sooraj Bharjatya. They, and only they, could delve deep into the mind of Suman (Bhagyashree) in maine pyaar kiyaa and dig out the fact that "around 28.97% of women in our country have been in a condition such as Suman ". While some who watched dostana and disliked it (unlike me) would say "yeah dude , it was fucking insulting for gays man", they would quip "Alas, with such portrayal of sexuality in modern day hindi films, 26.78 percent of homosexuals, bisexuals and bi curious men would be facing the brunt of the law that was brought to existence in the pre-colonial era of the british raj. We need to understand that it is so difficult living like a male-queer in a largely hetero-normitive society".

i would go... gasp gasp gasp.... for breath when the tisscian gets into his or her or T element. They could draw trails to statistics and history and sociology practically from anywhere. They think graphs. They think numbers. They think. And they think too much. For intellectually challenged misnomers like me, it is practically impossible to keep pace with the superfastness of the TISS mind. 

One of my old tisscian friends told me  "when he touched me the world swept and there was like a fire within me devoloping into a lava of sorts". I was like "dude, why cant you simply say that you felt sexually aroused" rather than saying... "mere tan badan mein aag lag gayee" in raani english. Rani english drama queen. huh. 

Varun went to Bangalore to learn dance.  That city is a TISScians perfect inttelectual match.  I went to Bangalore recently to the bangalore queer film festival. . I mean, everyone out there was discussing philosophy. They dissected the anatomy of being in the closet. They know section 377 like a bible. They can discuss Lord of the rings and M S Subalakshmi at the same breath. Especially Yell Romal Yem Singh. Even after watching a comedy film like kanchana. I saw people coming out and discussing the location, the lights, the ethos and the depths of the emotions that the film had delved in. Well, they also have a great great sense of humour. But when i maaro my sarcky jokes, they would look at me pokerfaced. And I would be like "jeesus christ, again someone felt bad". But then i gave it a thought later. I realised that may be they dont know me enough to understand that i have sarcasm and pun in my DNA. i remembered that I had severe issues even back home in Bombay when i used to crack jokes and people used to take them seriously. In Bangalore, they dont let little-minded  unintellectual people from bombay like me feel lost in this intellectual super-pool. I used to call bangalore a village, of course not seriously. But I have to eat my words. I have to because bangalore is a beautiful city. And people are awesome. It was fun to  be misunderstood by some people who thought i have an attitude problem. And that I am too unapproachable. Back home in bombay, im sure if someone said so, it will be a joke. For my number is one step far than being published in the newspaper as a distress helpline. :-) . 

I have to say that the warmth Bangalore exudes is tremendous. And people are super sexy. Even half the hot-maals have been exported to tinsel town from bangalore. There must be something special about the bangalore gene and something special about the TISS trees. Why are people there so fucking Awesome?

(P.S. Thank you varun1, sowmya reddy, romal, sriram, parul, rahul, nadir, varun2, shyam, Dolly and everybody for the wonderful time)

P.P.S i know my english is not that good.  Dont send me a 3 page analysis on my english. I am a grammar gandu and typos are my speciality. and FYI, I am fucking proud of it. LOL)

No Nicknaming Your "Privates"

Heard 3 cases of women as child sex abuse offenders, luring young boys (to touch their breasts, intercourse, finger their vagina, just dirty talk) from across the globe in the past 1 week.
When I said "equality", I seriously didn't mean this way. But women are humans, so the same demented behaviour would hold true to women and Ts. 

Time to talk sex.

Start with empowering your child with the right words let there be no shame in calling a penis is a penis (and not dindin) and a vagina a vagina (not chuchi) 

Say out loud!!!! 


Monday, April 09, 2012

Aankhon ki gustakhiyaan #LoveFromPals

Aansuon ke parde ke peeche,
tim-timaati do aankhein...
Sawaalon ke andheron se joonjhti,
jalte diyon si do aankhein...

Sameta hai samandar,
chhalakne na dena,
Behne na dena,
chamkti do aankhein... "

:: Deborah. :)

on my eyes in this much loved picture of mine holding tears in my eyes precariously by Jeet.

Thank you deborah. :)

Saturday, April 07, 2012

Housefull at HOUSEFULL2 : The #QuirkyReview

My friendly neighbourhood “big cinemas” multiplex was looking like a garibon ka shaadi mandal. I entered and luckily got one of the last few tickets that were available. And that too the lastest seat in the cinema hall. I entered and saw all the advertisements from videshi tourists having strong teeth to pimple creams. Whatever happened to my favorite good old  vicco vajradanti  ads. (The new ones are atrocious) Then was my favoritest national anthem. This is the special one that is the silent national anthem for the auditory challenged made for Big Cinemas by Mudra Communications. If you are from Mudra, I want you to know that I have become a regular with your client “big cinemas” just because of this product of yours. The little I could do to appreciate this marvel.

Given the title of this post, why am I talking about everything else but about the film.. you must be wondering. Well it is because, the comedy in gibberish films like Housefull2 have to be felt, experienced, you cant recreate it with words. I went to watch housefull2 with the mindset that I was going to watch a stupid senseless film where every attempt to find logic  would be futile. I was sure Sajid Khan is dumb and foolish and is incapable of sensible stuff. Shabaash-mere-sher  Director Sajid Khan lives up to my expectation.

To tell the story is a real brainy task. It is a mesh and a mess. And I am of the rare species of unintelligent homosexuals. So id not attempt that. I would just give you many  dots. You can join them and make the story at your will.

Like their real life names. Rishi Kapoor is Chintu. Randhir kapoor is dabbu. They are brothers from different mothers. One is jaayiz and other is naajaayiz. And the one that is the Jaayiz son – Chintu puts a name plate saying “the Real son”. The initial few minutes just establishes the bartardly plot of the whole script.  Both the brothers have one daughter each. Bobby – Asin and Henna – jacquiline. Both the daughters are animal rights activists. (god only knows why this angle? But still it warms the cockles of my heart to see that atleast in fiction someone is like that). 

Both the fathers look at getting their daughter married off to some multi-millionaires son. They both zero down on the maharashtrian - JD’s son. They have no idea how he looks. JD’s son is Jolly -  Riteish Deshmukh. But Reitesh is in love with a JLo(yeah! Right that’s the name).  Sindhi Boy - Shreyas Talpade’s father goes with the rishta of their son to Chintu and  Chintu insults him.  So he wants to take badla, and decides to get actual Jolly to date chintu’s daughter and leave her on the wedding day (if you are a feminist and are getting angry.  take a chill pill babes. No one makes any sense in this film). But since the actual Jolly Riteish is anyways in love, he decides to get Max (john) who is  a kleptomaniac to act as Jolly and date the daughter at a cause. But john lands up at Dabbu’s place instead of chintus. So Ritesh and Shreyas plant Sunny or Akshay, an old-jigridost-now-jaani dushman of John in Chintu’s house. What follows is a series of confusions, one liners, jokes, drama. There are plots and scenes and sub plots. If I could have the intelligence to remember everything, I would have completed my PhD.

I went to the theater to watch this stupid film just for my john.  Not for his acting. But for his eye-candy-ness. John Abraham is  my man-mandir-ka-devta, whose ek nazar leaves aag in my tan-badan. I went to drool, and I was surprised that I also found his acting too super cool. He was hot oven-fresh and  there are moments in the film where his comic timing is just perfect. My BlogDost Shobhaa De had said that his butt is more expressive than his face. “Well, de, that I don’t deny. But I really wish you watch this stupid film.” There are many scenes in the film where john gives “Uii maa” kind of reactions. A very jamuna bai ka kotha look. And so damn sexy. “Ufff… un adaaonse maar daaloge”. 

I know this blog is like a  family 'channel'. 
but couldn't stop myself from saying this. 

( if you are a kid, please close your eyes and pretend that you didnt see this. and if you are an adult, and offended... maafi baad mein maang loonga)
Akshay is controlled. Good performance, id say. And doesn’t go over the top to a level that it irritates you. He looks young and dashing. Some expressions were just fantastic. Though he seems to be sometimes on the path of govinda, he is far from reaching that level of atrocious stupidity.

When it comes to randhir kappoor and rishi kappor. I feel randhir acted very well, surpassing rishi as well. Which is shocking, because randhir has always proved with his films that he cannot act- he can only over act. His attempt at being shammi was too evident. While rishi kappoor continues to be rishi kapoor and is celebrated as that.

Asin, I wonder why she would do this role. she has got lead-heroine roles, then why stoop down.

Jaquiline - ,mmmmm… okay. She could be replaced by any one. Nothing special.

Riteish deshmukh was wow. And how.

Shreyas added up to the colourful cast with a splendid performance. But dear director, from which angle does shreyas look sindhi?

Here are some hilarious moments in the film
Ritesh Deshmukh is introduced as the driver-cum-bodyguard-cum-man-Friday of akshay and randhir kapoor asks him “Tum iske pehle kiske body guard the?” to which Riteish replies “President”. Randhir asks “president of America?” to which Riteish replies “nahi president of lions club of Bhandup”

The effervescent Johny Lever quips “Baap bhi lucchaa.. beti bhi luchhii.. gotchi re gotchi”

The funniest part that helped made me haste haste pichwada gul i.e. LMAO was this one.
JD (mithun) has invited Duke – Prince Charles to his son Jolly’s wedding. Rishi Kappor walks up to prince Charles very very very enthusiastically and tells him “Duke saab duke saab.. maine aap ka lemonade piyaa hai”

Rest there is no subject in the film. There is no sense in the film. But the film stands true to its expectation. Rather excels it. I expected nothing but senseless comedy. And I walked out with some good performances by John and Randhir. Which was suprising.
The story is complex. The music is appalling. Sajid-wajid need to take a vacation from bollywood. Music sucks.

The thing that is so evidently noticible is the gay subtext. The chemistry between John and Akshay is better than the chemistry they enjoy with the chokris. Also,  there are many scenes when they are very touchy.  Even riteish and shreyas hit it off quite well. In the end of the film if you have to recollect you could  almost  say “john and Akshay, and  reitesh and shereyas”” were the romantic pairs. There  is a scene when marriage broker – Chunkey pandey (who hopelessly tries to be Javed Jaffery) tells randhir kapoor while both were on the bed “meri janam janam ke pyaas ko bhuja do”. May be the director sajid khan got the visible gay dialogues in the film to add more spice to the story. And since we homosexuals are awesome people they want to add a bit of good-luck to their films with a fake subtext. Or is it that Sajid Khan wants to come out of the closet. Cinematically for now. 

My suggestion.. go watch it, but don’t analyze. If you enjoy being stupid, like I do. Then this film is a must-watch. Don’t expect a classic.  With a title like "housefull2" to expect a classic? Isnt it like going to an udipi restaurant and asking for pizza? you know what i mean? 

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